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| Speed Costs | | Posted by on 27-May-2005 | | 54 people have seen this joke. | |
While I was driving down the freeway the other day, (going a little faster than I should have been) passed under a overpass only to see a "boy in blue" on the other side with a radar gun laying in wait. The cop pulled me over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronising smirk, asked
"Runway too short ?"
To which I replied, "I'm late for work."
To which he asked, "What do you do?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher," I responded.
The cop was surprised and confused. "A what ? A rectum stretcher ?? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?"
"Well," I said, "I start by inserting one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in, I work side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch the hole, until it's about 6 feet."
Then the copper asked questioningly and cautiously, "And just what do you do with a six-foot arsehole ?"
To which I politely replied "You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge..."
Speeding ticket: $ 180.00
Court costs: $ 65.00
Look on copper's face ... Priceless....
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